The "S" Word.

Today was one of those days I have been dreading for the past month or so. Hayden had surgery today and I am sure you are probably wondering why. Well, from birth Hayden has had a hydrocele. At first everyone told us not to worry about it because 9 times out of 10 they just resolve themselves. When he turned a year old, everyone was still sure it would go away. When he turned two, it still had not dissipated. In fact, it had actually gotten bigger as time had passed. So, we saw a pediatric urologist and surgery was set to remove it. 

So, today was the day. I woke up at 5am and started the slow process of getting myself dressed and waking the littles up. I figured Riley would be ticked, but he was actually in an insanely good mood for being woken up at 5:30 in the morning. We dropped him off at grandma's and made our way to St. Vincent to see Dr. Cain. When we got there and got Hayden undressed and in his hospital gown it goes without saying that Hayden knew something was up and he was not pleased. Not in the least. Then the tears started as Dr. Cain and Dr. Moore came to talk with us about the operation and how his anesthesia would work.

Big baby tears =(

Once the doctors left before he was wheeled back, he cheered up a bit. When the nurse came in to take him back to the OR he was happy and she took him back in a nice red wagon. He had no idea. He never even looked back at us. They told us the surgery would take around 45 minutes to an hour and they would come get us in the waiting room as soon as he was brought back to his room. So we waited. Jonathan and I talked about what the wait during Lukas' surgery would be like and in some way I just couldn't explain Hayden's surgery, regardless of how minor, meant more. When we looked up we realized more than an hour had passed, but didn't think much of it since we knew it took time to get him to sleep, get the IV and breathing tube in place, and do the caudal block before the surgery even began. When that hour stretched into two, we got nervous. Finally a nurse came and got us and said Dr. Cain would be in just a moment.

He came in rather quickly while our boy was walking up and man was he angry. He was thrashing about like crazy and apparently anesthesia turns you into the incredible Hulk because he was strong as heck and hard to hold. Dr. Cain apologized for the surgery taking longer than he had anticipated, but it turned out to be a little more extensive than he originally thought. Not only did Hayden have the hydrocele, he also had a very large hernia that needed repaired as well. Dr. Cain explained the sack of fluid itself was about the size of an orange and had a "peel" on it about 1/4" thick. At the end of the day, the hydrocele is removed, and the hernia has been permanently fixed. Phew.

Then, Hayden slowly started to settle down after a little dose of morphine and he fell asleep in his Dadd'y arms while we waited to go home.

Finally comfortable with Daddy

Finally, we got the word they we were good to go as long as we felt comfortable. You could tell little Hayden was uncomfortable, but we knew he just needed to go home and relax with his favorite pillow and blankie to feel better. 

See his poor little hand where his IV was? (tear)

We picked up our big boy from grandma's so he could go to school and he was so concerned about his little brother. Everytime Hayden would whimper Riley chimed right in saying "its okay Hayden, its alright." How precious is that? He told us Hayden was hurt, but he was awful jealous of that Buzz Lightyear bandaid on Hayden's hand. He told us his hand hurt too and he wanted a Buzz bandaid like Hayden.  

Thankfully, we are home resting comfortably now. I am sitting on the couch next to my sleepy, drugged little boy. We will keep his pain medicine up for the next 48 hours or so, then switch him over to regular Motrin. For now, we are keeping him comfortable and as pain free as possible. 

So while my little boy sleeps, one final thought before I check out for the day. My second echo is tomorrow, which is giving me some anxiety. Turns out I have to go alone after all and the idea of that makes me a little nervous. All of those feelings rushing back and having no one there to comfort and reassure me is going to be rough indeed. I will get through it though. Just par for the course, I have to keep telling myself that. 

Have a happy Tuesday everyone and please keep up the thoughts and prayers for Lukas. Its like a great big bandaid for my heart to know people out there are thinking about him.